the sting, or how low can she go?

reader, the sting... it continues. the dogs, it turns out, are smarter and much more cunning than either the baron or the husband realized. these dogs, they very much remind the baron of that part in 'jurassic park'? the one where laura dern says to sam neill, 'well, we only have to worry if they figure out how to open doors' or something like that (she's referring to those pesky velaceraptors, the ones who killed samuel l. jackson's character, leaving just his arm?). and sam neill says something like, 'yeah, that won't happen.' then the VERY NEXT SHOT is of two velaceraptors opening the kitchen door to make a meal out of those kids?

yep, that's how they see the dogs, like unruly animals who are 1) mostly out for themselves, even if it's to the detriment of the others in the pack and 2) smart.

to wit:

yesterday, the baron drove home, intending to park along the street rather than the driveway - this, she thought would allow her the element of surprise. she would sneak through the gate and creep up the steps, then - she was SURE - catch dexter on the sofa.

but.

the dogs knew she was coming, probably because they've come to recognize the sound of her car. so, instead of surprising them with her stealth and cunning, she pulled up to the curb only to see tucker and dexter peering through the window at her. and, reader, you know what? THEY WERE ON THE LOVE SEAT.

the baron, angry and unwilling to give up, pulled away from the curb and did a turn around the neighborhood, finally parking at the end of her neighbor's driveway. it's a little hard to describe, but this driveway allows a view into the sun room from the opposite side of the room as the front door, i.e. the opposite side of the room from where she had just seen two expectant faces peering out at her. also, there are no stairs on the neighbor's driveway side of the sun room; the baron climbed onto his lawn, which was not quite high enough, to see if she couldn't get a peek into the room.

so.

on the neighbor's not-quite-high-enough lawn, where she could just barely almost see into her own house, the baron started to jump. up and down. you know, to get a better view.

and, because it WOULD happen to her - the neighbor came home. while she was jumping. while her car was almost not quite blocking his driveway. reader, she felt stupid. really, cripplingly stupid.

this feeling did not abate. especially after this exchange:
the neighbor (through the rolled down window of the cab of his truck): the baron, are you ok?
the baron: um, yes.
the neighbor: what are you doing?
the baron: um. ah. i am so embarrassed to say this. i am trying to see into my house to catch one, two or all of my dogs on the furniture. scolding them only works if you catch them IN THE ACT, so i'm, uh, trying to catch them in the act.
the neighbor: ok... i thought maybe someone was in your house.
the baron: yeah... no, just me, trying to spy on my dogs.
the neighbor: well, do you want to climb into the bed of the truck to look in the window?
the baron: thanks, no.

the worst part, even worse than the embarrassment of being caught spying on her own house? dexter was watching the entire exchange. through the window, FROM THE LOVE SEAT.