monday

the baron would like to apologize to her tens and tens of readers out there in the interweb ether. she knows the baron says... has been neglected lately, but she has a good reason: today is the second day of her new job! so far, she likes it, and so far, she hasn't burned anything down.

the baron suspects that postings at the baron says... will be on the light side for the next little while. in addition to this new job, she and the husband plan a vacation at the end of this week, which means that the baron will be thinking of sunblock and bathing suit lines (and, truthfully, cellulite) rather than you, dear reader. sorry about that.

but! fear not! she'll be back as soon as she can, and in the meantime she misses you.

multi-tasking

above is another poor quality photograph, and for that the baron apologizes.

she had to take the picture, though, because it was just so ridiculous. that's her big green bottle of conditioner, there in the back; some micro refiner from the body shop, there in that orange tube; and another conditioner - a hotel sample, but a really good one, there in the front right. and in the very front of the shower rack? yes, that's dental floss, nestled in among those OTHER THINGS YOU'D TYPICALLY FIND IN A SHOWER RACK.

the husband, when asked, claimed no knowledge of the shower floss, he had no idea how that floss came to share shower real estate with the conditioners, but the baron knows better. after all, it's just the two of them who live in the house, just two of them that use that shower, and the baron is CERTAIN that she didn't floss her teeth in the shower. she's a big, big fan of flossing - and has the dental records to prove it - but, if she had flossed in the shower, she would have disposed of the used floss in the trash can; she would not have left it in a tanlged wad on top of the shampoo.

the baron thinks that the husband might want to consider his bathroom rituals, that's all.

a pleasant surprise

the past few months, the husband and the baron have been slowly working their way through the x-files television series. they own seasons 1 and 2, and have netflixed the remaining seasons('netflixed' may not be an actual verb). just now, they are nearly done with season 8. season 8's a rough one to watch - it's dramatic in an eye-rolling and inadvertently funny way, new characters are introduced to mixed results, mulder is gone for most of it, scully cries a lot, krycek has aged VERY BADLY, skinner is as severe as ever, alien replicants walk among us... it really could use some levity to brighten it all up. that's not to say the season is all bad, though - there is a bright spot.

that bright spot's name is robert patrick, he of the slightly malformed ears and lean physique. though neither the baron nor the husband can place his accent - is that brooklyn? or boston? - they like him anyway, especially as scully's disbelieving foil and heir to mulder's lost cause. also, his suits fit him really nicely, and a fitted suit ALWAYS helps.

the baron isn't one to read too much into popular entertainment - it's just a show, eh? - but she's pleasantly surprised about this robert patrick situtation. his good and sincere acting is a small satisfaction, one that makes the day a little better - rather like finding a $5 bill in the husband's pants pocket just before doing laundry.

our baby

the baron knows the photo above is a poor one - shot in light too low and out of focus to boot. what really gets her, though, is that the husband took the picture at all.

it's a potato, one that stayed in the basket too long. (the baron keeps a basket in the kitchen for onions, garlic and, occasionally, potatoes. right now, there are also sunflower seeds in this basket, kept there for the baron when she works her way through all 9 seasons of the x-files.) the baron can't really remember why she bought but did not use this potato - maybe to thicken up a soup, or to add to an indian dish? actually, she can't even remember WHEN she bought it. she does remember seeing it from time to time in the basket, grabbing it accidentally when she was groping for an onion, and thinking, 'ah! that potato! better use it soon before its eyes sprout'. ahem.

she does not remember seeing the slow progression of those spindly growths, of that she is sure. so, when the husband finally the pulled the potato out of the basket, the baron was VERY SURPRISED indeed at the state of it.

even more surprising was the shape of it, the way those off-shoots look like nascent arms and legs. and, with a little imagination, that white blooming thing at the top? maybe like a small fancy hat, or the beginnings of a face? on the sofa there, leaning just so against the cushions, that potato looks very much like a baby. a creepy baby, but a baby nonetheless. don't you think?

trivia night

last night, the baron and the husband went to trivia night at a local restaurant/bar. the game was set up so that people could play solo or on teams (mostly on teams, but one guy sat alone at the bar and called himself 'the lone trivializer'). the baron and the husband played on a team with kevin's sister gina (that's her in the photo above, which was taken in a booth at the bar last night. she is wearing some graceland glasses, but that's another story.).

the husband named their team of three snack wagon, and as the rounds started they were excited about it. the evening's host was k. tomko: he dreamed up all sorts of questions, in 6 categories: the first four considered regular play, the last two considered bonus rounds, and a final question upon which teams could wager all their points to win.

the first category was 'bushisms'. all the answers contained 'bush' (for example, one of the answers was 'here we go 'round the mulberry bush'. snack wagon missed that one.). in that category, snack wagon got 4 of 8 possible.

the second category kevin called 'baltimorons'; all the answers were notable people from baltimore. two or three answers were sports figures, which put snack wagon out right away. in the end, the baron and her teammates got just three correct (john waters, johns hopkins, and a forgotten last one). total: 6 points.

category three was kevin bacon movies. answers included 'friday the 13th', 'footloose', 'mystic river', 'stir of echoes' and 'animal house'. the baron can't remember exactly, but she thinks snack wagon got 6 correct, for 18 points. (by the way, the points were determined as follows: round 1, correct answers multiplied by 1 for total points. round 2, correct answers multiplied by 2 for total points. round 3, correct answers multiplied by 3 for total points. you're following now, right?)

category four: the 27 club. evidently, a number of musicians have died at the age of 27, becoming members of the '27 club'. answers included joplin, hendrix, cobain, and morrison. total points: 24.

categories five and six were 90s songs and state capitals. for the songs, kevin gave a shatner-esque reading of the lyrics; teams were to guess the band. believe the baron when she says that it's hard to pick out weezer's 'buddy holly' when kevin gives it this treatment:

oh oh

and you're

mary TYler

moore

i

don't care

what

THEY say

about US

anyWAY i don't

care

about that.

other lyrics included 'baby got back' and a few country songs. for the state capitals, kevin named three states, and the teams were to write down which states' capital came first, alphabetically. snack wagon had been feeling pretty bad about themselves, on account of the low scores (low compared to other teams at the bar), but this capitals category did them in for sure.
the baron incorrectly identified the capital of new york state as new york city, and of michigan, ann arbor. the husband incorrectly identified the capital of iowa as cedar rapids. none of the three could remember the capitals of new jersey, south dakota, or connecticut. it was a most humbling experience indeed, considering that THE BARON AND THE HUSBAND HAVE BEEN TO ALL OF THOSE PLACES.

the kicker? the group at the bar, a group that the baron had identified idiots based on their drunk and scantily attired appearance? those girls knew their state capitals. ahem.

for the final question, on the topic of fairy tales, snack wagon was pretty confident. so confident, in fact, that the team wagered their entire points total. the baron had taken a children's literature course in college, and - even though college was lo those years ago - she had a fairly good handle on her fairy tales.

unfortunatly, kevin had other ideas and spoke this question: name all seven of snow white's dwarves.

snack wagon didn't double their score. snack wagon came in near the bottom of the team rankings. snack wagon put on their graceland glasses and their dunce caps and went home.

movin' on up

this is an exciting time for the baron and the husband.

after years of toil in a miserable industry (well, more like an industry that runs off the misery of others, and NO IT'S NOT THE INSURANCE INDUSTRY), at essentially the same agency for the last 10-odd years, the husband has finally reached the brass ring - a permanent full time job with the federal government. it doesn't sound like much, but it kind of is: he essentially wrote his own job description, it's work he likes, the benefits are good, and - because it's an agency under the DHS umbrella - the money will never stop rolling in.

it does not escape the husband's attention that his 18 year old self would throw rocks, beer caps and skateboards at his 35 year old self.

music in the night

today the baron is thinking about... well, really the baron is thinking about speculums, but she's trying to let that particular train of thought conclude. she'll take a moment and shake it off.

ahem. the baron is now thinking of r.e.m., specifically about how much she likes them, and about how some of their songs are deeply a part of her history.

for instance, she remembers "out of time" and the first time she saw the cassette of it, the day of her junior high graduation. it was a gift, given to the baron's friend jenny by jenny's parents and the baron recalls mild curiousity followed by keen understanding ("ah! that 'radio song'! this band sings it!"). the only other thing she remembers about that day is the dress she was wearing - black with large flowers (pinks and yellows and reds with green leaves) with a boat neck. since then, 'near wild heaven' has become one of her favorite songs, and if she can hear it on her way to the end of it all, she'd be just fine. (also, the baron has a long harbored a crush on mike mills.)

she remembers "automatic for the people", which she first discovered in high school, in the back of a friend's parent's car, on the way to swim practice. for her, it recalls those early morning summertime swim sessions, when they were into the pool and warmed up before the sun even broke the sky. the car, and the baron and her friend, smelled of chlorine and sunblock. those were the scents that hovered all season. jessica (the friend in whose parent's car they travelled) and the baron would sing along to 'nightswimming', thrilled about the melody and michael stipe's voice and the idea of swimming naked. (the baron would mention here that 'ignoreland' and 'man on the moon' are also good sing-along songs from this album.) "automatic for the people" also reminds the baron of her neighborhood in california, one of her favorite places in the whole world, a place where - even in july - light mist rolls through the streets and between the houses, and the odd coyote or two can appear under a streetlight just as the natural light is failing. for her, it's a near perfect album (the only draw back being 'everybody hurts', which makes her cringe EVERY TIME. the video makes her want to claw her eyes out.), evocative of all those good southern california things. was there ever a more beautiful song than 'find the river'?

she found "new adventures in hi-fi" in college maybe, or perhaps the first year of graduate school? for her, it's a fair album, notable for 'electrolite' (that jangly piano? those lyrics, those california-specific lyrics, are delicious.). wherever, whenever she came to this album is gone - those memories aren't banked in her head. 'be mine' is mostly what she remembers of this album now, and how the lyrics are trite and meaningful all at the same time. how it's a perfect and ironic love song, saved from sap by its edge.

in recent years, the baron has fallen away from r.e.m. - though she still would think of them fondly. the newer albums, particularly after "up", didn't much impress her, though the husband - an ardent r.e.m. fan himself - continued to buy them, from habit or loyalty. r.e.m. is currently touring in support of their new album, "accelerate"; the baron and the husband were gifted tickets to the band's maryland show. they played some old songs, they played some new songs, and the baron and the husband found themselves pleasantly surprised by the quality of it all. it turned out to be one more memory for her to add to the r.e.m. file, a good memory of that time they saw r.e.m. together.