speed ikea

many years ago, on their first trip to the smithsonian museums, the baron and the brother invented a game they called 'speed museum'. reader, you'll be able to figure out the premise of the game based on its name, but let the baron flesh it out for you: it turns out that, contrary to her own idea of herself, the baron cannot pore over museum collections, brow furrowed in heavy, heavy thought. neither can the brother. in fact, what worked best for them was a brisk walk around the museum, with occasional pauses for something REALLY amazing, then, lunch.

the beauty of speed museum is that it's applicable to so many other parts of life: speed grocery store, for instance, is something the baron has played on many, many an occasion.

recently, the husband - in a very kind gesture - offered to visit that unholiest of places, ikea. the baron wanted to visit the fabric section, ONLY the fabric section, to see what ikea carried and to see if the prices were reasonable. they made a tacit agreement to play speed ikea, but you know what?


ikea had other plans for them, in the form of two sets of drinking glasses (those elephants are SO CUTE!) and six wine glasses.

sigh.

uncommonly good weather (for february)

reader, the baron's part of the world experienced some very nice (read: 60 degree) weather two weekends ago. it was welcome respite from the likes of winter, and the husband and the baron (and the dogs) took full advantage of the sunshine.

for instance, here is harlan basking in both the sun and his total disregard for the blueberry patch.


here are dexter and tucker, uh, playing.


and acrobatics.


and the baron with baron, who spies something in the distance.


and lunch outside. the husband, though red-haired and freckled, claims part greek heritage and he will never let you forget it.

tweedy, tweedy

the baron bought this suit a few months ago, just at the start of fall. she was having visions of pemberley-esque estates, horse stables, hunting dogs, and everyone dressed just so... 'just so', in this case, referring to something tweedy.

this suit (nubby black and white tweed with spots of grey and - hand to god, reader - light blue!) is quite old (vintage is the nicer way to phrase it), came to the baron courtesy of an etsy shop, for only $45, and she loves it. she's only worn it once, just last week, and she felt very headmaster-of-a-school all day long... oh, what a feeling!

2009 nba all-star game

since the husband has been deployed to kentucky for the next few days, the baron is taking the opportunity hoard the remote control for herself: she is watching the nba all-star game.

so far, there has been no basketball played per se , but shaquille o'neal has charmed her, what with his white-masked dancing. for a big guy, he's kind of spry... sprier than you'd think, having seen him lumber down the court anyway.

when announced, the east coast starters (that's wade, garnett, howard, james and iverson) each did a little dance, culminating in james' pushing himself past his teammates to take the floor for himself.

when announced, the west coast starters (that's paul, ming, duncan, stoudemire, and bryant) were generally humorless. the baron wasn't expecting them to do jigs or anything (especially that yao ming fellow), but a little personality would have been refreshing. 'it must be hard to be so rich', hypothesized the baron's friend laura (by way of explaining their grim faces).

also, no offense to the raptors, but why again with the canadian national anthem?

the baron is rooting for the east coast team, because she likes the east-coast team's players better: o'neal and nowitzki just aren't enough to overcome the likes of kobe bryant or tony parker. maybe if steve nash had made the team this year the baron would feel a little more torn, but as it is, she's just over these west coast players... which is kind of too bad, since - as she's typed the above text - the game has started and the west coast team is leading the east (at the end of the 1st quarter anyway) by 5.

the camera has cut to phil jackson a number of times, and you know what reader? the baron is remains unconvinced that he is entirely caucasian.

sigh. as the husband is gone, it falls to the baron to let the dogs out for their evening, ah, constitutional, which should be happening right about now. later, reader.

surprised? the baron is too.

today the baron is thinking about riverside, california, where she grew up.

this morning, when insomnia hit her, between the hours of 3 and 5 a.m., the baron remembered the sandwich shop very close to her childhood home, located in a sweet shopping area nostalgically called the town center. the town center, in addition to this sandwich shop, is also home to a coffee shop (locally owned and operated), a bagel shop (locally owned and operated), a children's book store (locally owned and operated), and various other shops and eateries.

not all the shops at the town center are locally owned and operated - there's recently a starbucks there, as well as a rite aid - but the flavor of the place, to the baron, remains undiluted by these nationwide chains.

from the town center, her mind wandered westward, toward riverside's oldest neighborhoods, some of which are in dire need of some tlc, a few of which host some really amazing manors, the likes of which are no longer built. that's maybe her favorite part of town, at least for the aesthetics... the houses are rambling and beautiful, and sit on huge lots. she often wishes she owned and lived in one, right at the base of mount rubidoux.

from there, she thought over to the university of california at riverside, a campus that is apparently booming. she thought about the one big mall in town, called the galleria at tyler, and about how her first job was at a bookstore there. she thought about downtown, about the christmas lights at the mission inn, and about the central library, and about the barbeque place across the street from both of them, a spot she frequented in her pre-vegetarian years.

reader, this morning, between 3 and 5 a.m., the baron thought over all her favorite parts of riverside, and you know what? she experienced a jarring realization.

she misses riverside.

she had been saying, lo' these years, that she misses california, but the truth is she misses riverside. in her teens and early twenties, she thought that the town center, and the mall, and the library and riverside's quaint downtown were consipiring to suffocate her, literally choking the breath right out of her, so badly did she want to escape. she rejected riverside, and california, thinking that only a failure would choose the unadventurous life, living in a state already experienced. there was, after all, an entire country out there yet to be seen.

you can see, reader, how this early morning realization came as a shock.

it might be that her mother's reports of 75 degree days, coupled with one month more of actual winter in maryland, is helping the baron shellac a coat of nostalgia, and whimsy, and wasn't-it-good-when onto her childhood memories.

or, maybe not.

maybe she really DOES want to end up right where she started. what an arresting and frightening thought.

read this

the husband pointed this blog out to the baron this morning, and reader, it might be the funniest thing on the interwebs.

fyi, it might not be safe for work... on account of the author's liberal use of the word 'fuck'.

trying to work out the white balance

this morning, the baron is thinking of an afternoon - many, many years ago - she spent with her friend lady x, at lady x's house. the two were lounging around the pool trying to come up with something suitable for lady x's end of the quarter project for her photography class, based on the theme of 'disconnectedness' or something like that. it helped their spirits that they were in the pool, though the baron can't quite remember how the project turned out, though she's thinking that lady x's brother bravely stood in as photographic guinea pig. lady x, maybe you can fill in the details here...?

the baron is reflecting on that afternoon because, reader, she's not very good with the camera she uses to take most of the photos you see here at the baron says. it came as a HUGE surprise to her that there was more to photography than point, focus, click, and her ignorance about the whole thing is kind of getting to her. she wishes she had picked lady x's brain a little more way back when. alas.

one of the things that really bugs the baron about her photos, for example, is the yellow tint some of them get, usually in lower light settings. her natural, uneducated instinct is to put the flash on, but then her subjects look like starlets stumbling out of a bar very early in the morning... you know that look, reader: OVEREXPOSED. this issue has been bothering her for a VERY LONG TIME, but.

the baron recently discovered the white balance option in the camera's menu. turns out, not all taken-in-the-evening-time-photos have to have that weird yellow tint. who the hell knew!?

anyhoo, revisit the photo at the top of the post, and compare it to the one at the bottom of the post. the baron, she is making progress, one tiny, tiny step at a time.